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Today's issue is about the history and trauma of the royal family. As you know, king rolo and queen sally are the proud parents of three beautiful children.
Now, as Sally is perched on my shoulder with her arms around my neck (and this is NOT a hug), I am forced to say that Roland and Sally were NEVER married (only happen to be king and queen). but, the question arises...."WHERE THE HECK DID ROSA AND I COME FROM?" maybe, just maybe, we are related to the queen of the north....but that is the story that DNA needs to reveal (Hannah, get your freezing butt from the north over here!!!!!!!!)
Further sources tell us that Rosa (the princess of ers a lot) and the princess of quite a lot (yours truly, silly citizens) were seperated at birth and reunited just recently. of course, NO ONE TOLD US ABOUT THIS STINKING CONSPIRACY!!!!!! This is the evidence we have so far (thank god Sally doesn't have her hands around my neck right now, Muwahahaha!)
Once upon a time there was a guy called Captain Squeegy the Albino Gnome®, and CSTAB set his foot into royal land about 13 years ago. rumor has it that he had an affair with a nymph and so came forth PIRATE JACK®!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! now, pirate Jack was some dude that fell in love with queen Sal Sal's sister, Morghan and so came forth, rosa princess of ers a lot, and sara princess of quite a lot. and then, a tragic plague of sillyness swept over the Kingdom, wiping out every citizen who was not worthy of being silly. These special people are those that make up the kingdom today.
Well, Morghan and Pirate Jack® were not worthy of the priveleges of being silly, so Sara and rosa were given to Queen Sal Sal and King Rolo. unfortunetly, Sara was left on the side of the road when they were picking up the three young royal-sillyness-victims-to-be and not found for three years. when she was found, sal sal and rolo felt bad so they proclaimed her (RATHER, SHE PROCLAIMED HERSELF) the princess of quite a lot. and they all lived sill-y-ly ever after!
Other kingdom news:
Sir k is still up for adoption, lowering the bidding to 15 cents. any takers?
Queen Sal Sal's busy bees are currently united with queen Hannah's penguins against princess Sara's army-of-pink-ponies-to-be (HINT HINT). I'm not sure WHY!!!! but theu just are. maybe the perfume got to them or something....the world may never know!
How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? Answer correctly and receive.....um.....one mitten men! good luck!